The Fourth Kenai Peninsula Open came and went last weekend. Gail force winds, very unusual at Birch Ridge, made scoring next to impossible Saturday during the first round of play. James Contreras managed the conditions as well as he could to build a sizeable lead entering Sunday’s final round where a stock 68 sealed the championship.

The Clarion did a wonderful job of covering the golf tournament earlier in the week so I won’t go into great detail or mention how many penalty strokes I took over the weekend. However, I do want to thank some of the folks involved in making the tournament special.

Jim Bennett and Kathy Gensel do so much for the event. It wouldn’t even be possible without their help. It’s important to thank the golf course staff. The turf crew puts in a lot of extra work to get the course in cherry condition. Cherry is a term used by young kids to describe something that is good. I think anyways.

Thanks to Rita Geller, Pat Cowan and Myrna Cowan for taking care of business in the pro shop so I could happily endure all the bad golf shots I hit during the tournament. The good gal award goes to Lori Riggs-Bishop for volunteering to prepare the Sunday dinner, and wow, what a culinary performance she put on! I can’t wait for next year’s tournament! Actually, I can. I fear winter. …

Old Folks Golf

The older is better group was in a jovial mood Monday morning. Frank “The Tank” Harper took 48 strokes to play the course but after deducting his handicap he emerged victorious with a net 30. Tom Boedeker paired with Sid Cox to capture closest-to honors at the sixth and eighth. Boedeker, not wanting his opponents to gain confidence from a brief moment of success, rolled in the long putt at the ninth as well for good measure.

Tuesday Morning Ladies League

Chiya Bazan stole the show and the hearts of men with her stunning performance Tuesday morning at ladies league. Bazan won low gross and low-net honors by playing substantially better than her competition. Margaret Stanley mailed in the fewest putts but the rest of her game was lost in transit. Misty McCown hit a beautiful shot at the sixth, closer than any other attempt. Denise Cox made a birdie at the eighth.

Thursday Night Couples

The lovebirds showed surprising tenacity a week ago fighting blustery, rain-soaked conditions to struggle through nine grueling holes of golf. At the end of the evening, after great debate, Gary “Electric” Dawkins and his fabulous chef Lori Riggs-Bishop cooked up the winning tally. Lore Weimer brought in her golf mercenary, Don “Super Seahawk” McGhee, to claim a second-place finish.

Golf Joke of the Week

Bill and Max decide to play a round together and “play it as it lies” on all shots. Both hit their tee shots on the par-5 first down the middle and about 260 yards. They drive up for the second shot, and then Bill hits his shot down the middle for an easy approach. But Nick slices his over the trees and it ends up in the cart path of the adjoining hole.

“Guess I get a free drop from the cart path,” he says.

“Oh no,” says Bill, “We agreed. Play it as it lies.”

So Max drives Bill up to his ball in front of the green, drops him off and drives back over to his ball on the cart path. Bill watches in amusement as sparks shower down from the practice swings of his opponent, then in amazement as a perfectly struck shot lands on the green and roles to within 3 feet of the pin. Max drives back to the green.

Bill says, “Great shot back there! What club did you use.”

Max responds, “Your 5-iron.”