“This people honors me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.” Mark 7:6
“Better a dry crust with peace than a house full of feasting with strife.” Proverbs 17:1
Let’s be honest — for many people, the holidays don’t feel very holy anymore. Plenty quietly dread them. Why?
The top reasons are familiar: long lines, aggressive drivers, and awkward family get-togethers. One man even admitted his biggest reason for dreading the season is that he often forgets why he’s celebrating in the first place.
That confession captures what I call the “Unholy Holiday Trinity” — three habits that pull us away from what Christmas is meant to be: overspending on gifts, overbooking your schedule, and overlooking family drama.
When these take over, the holidays lose their sacred center. They become filled instead with discontentment, distraction, and dysfunction — and that quietly dishonors Jesus Christ.
That might sound strong, but when we say Christmas is about Christ and then live in ways that squeeze him out, we take his name in vain. We claim the holidays are an opportunity to create sacred space for Jesus, yet we fill that space with stress, spending and strained relationships.
It reminds me of what Jesus told the religious leaders in Mark 7:6 when he quoted Isaiah: “This people honors Me with their lips, but their heart is far from Me.”
We do something similar when we celebrate Christmas in name but lose Christ in practice.
So here’s the question: How do we make the holidays holy again?
The answer is simple — but not easy: Embrace limitations and set boundaries.
Embracing your limitations means living within your means. People who live in “crisis mode” are often guilty of overspending and overbooking. Living beyond your means may create an airbrushed version of yourself, but underneath it all lies misery and strife. Say yes to less so you can say yes to what’s best.
And while much has been written about setting boundaries, ’tis the season for another reminder. Boundaries define how you allow others to engage with you. They don’t exist to cut off or control relationships, but to cultivate and contain them. Scripture affirms wise boundaries — avoiding meddling (Proverbs 26:17), gaslighting (26:18–19) and provoking (26:20–21).
So, here are a few practical ways to reclaim the holidays:
Create a holiday spending plan — like, today.
Offer your children fewer possessions and more experiences.
Schedule slow evenings with your family — not low-pressure times, but no-pressure times.
Set boundaries ahead of time and prepare gracious response scripts for tough moments.
One final thought: the older my kids get — and the older I get — the more I want to create a holiday culture I’ll want for my grandkids. The way you handle the holidays with your children will shape how they handle the holidays with theirs.
The holidays don’t have to become the Unholidays. With a little prudence — and a lot of intention — you can make them holy again.
In your corner,
Andrew
Andrew and Kristy Miller, along with their seven children, live in Sterling and serve at Sterling Baptist Church located at the corner of Swanson River Road and the Sterling Highway. Family worship is at 11 a.m. on Sundays.
