July already? The summer months are flying by as we enter the busiest portion of the golf calendar. Conoco Phillips is holding a company scramble July 10 and the Birch Ridge Golf Association All-Alaskan Pro-Am and Skins Game is July 13.

Teams for the pro-am are filling up fast. If you are interested in playing call the pro-shop to add your name to the waiting list. Currently, 12 Alaska golf pros from all over the state are slated to compete in this very popular event. Wells Fargo sponsors and hosts a community barbecue at the conclusion of play.

The BRGA, led by Gary “El Presidente” Davis, is building a new outdoor bathroom facility to replace the old outhouse behind the No. 4 tee box. If you see Gary out on the golf course after the project is finished be sure to give him a high-five for all the work he’s done. After you wash your hands of course!

Bill “The Thrill” Engberg and our merry band of grass aficionados have the golf course in excellent condition. The greens in particular are delightfully true. You’ll notice a handful of spruce trees have been transplanted to the area between four and five fairways. In time the trees will add much needed shape to the fourth hole.

Old Folks Golf

Darell Jelsma has announced himself as the greatest old golfer in Soldotna with a slick 43 on Monday morning at Birch Ridge. Jelsma’s effort was good enough for low gross honors. Tim “Doc” Bowser netted a 31 in a surgical performance. Jelsma further embellished his golfing legacy with brilliant strikes at the sixth and eighth, capturing closest to. Pat McElroy stole a glimmer of glory with the long putt at the ninth, but the day belonged to Jelsma.

Tuesday Morning Ladies League

Louise “Rock the Cradle” Schadle, Georgia “Wheels” Bentley, Leona “Action” Jackson and KayCee Christenson paired to post a gross 35 in grueling scramble conditions. The Richards girls, Anika and Katelin, teamed up with Danica Schmidt and JulieAnn Nye for a second-place finish. The team of all junior golfers topped two other adult teams with a gross 37.

Thursday Night Couples

Pat and Myrna Cowan used home-course knowledge to propel themselves to a one-shot victory over the fightin’ Jelsmas, Darell and Susan. Couples played alternate shot on holes 1 through 3, scramble on holes 4 through 6, and worst ball on holes 7 through 9. The difference was stellar alternate-shot play from the Cowans. No doubt 50-plus years of marriage contributed to their cohesive performance.

High-fives go to Tanna Chenault for bringing a stellar supply of salmon goodies for dinner! The Chenaults, Husseys and the Dawkins-Riggs-Bishop pairing received participation awards for their golfing efforts.

Joke of the Week

Jim and Kurt decide to play a round of golf together and “play it as it lies” on all shots. Both hit their tee shots on the par-5 first down the middle and about 260 yards.

They drive up for the second shot, and Kurt hits his shot down the middle for an easy approach. Jim slices his over the trees and it ends up in the cart path of the adjacent hole.

“Guess I get a free drop from the cart path,” he says.

“Oh no,” says Kurt, “We agreed. Play it as it lies.”

So Jim drives Kurt up to his ball in front of the green, drops him off and drives over to his ball on the cart path.

Kurt watches in amusement as sparks shower down from the practice swings of his opponent, then, in amazement as a perfectly struck shot lands on the green and roles to within 3 feet of the pin.

Jim drives back to the green.

Kurt says, “Great shot back there! What club did you use?”

Jim responds, “Your 6-iron.”