Will Morrow (courtesy)

Will Morrow (courtesy)

Let it snow

I would like it to snow, but I would appreciate it if it would do so at a time that’s convenient for me.

I like snow.

I’m already seeing some social media comments from people who are tired of winter. I hate to break it to them, but we’re only a month in, and we’ve got a solid five months to go.

Maybe it’s a sort of Stockholm syndrome — winter holds us captive for so long, and I’ve developed a positive emotional response to that captivity. I’d like to think I’ve simply learned to appreciate what the Alaska winter has to offer, but there are people I talk to who think I’m a little crazy.

I’ll admit, when other people are groaning about a late-April snowfall, I’m the guy looking forward to potentially skiing in May.

So, maybe I have been out in the cold just a little too long. Then again, if it’s going to be cold, we might as well have some snow, right?

All that said, I do have one request: I would like it to snow, but I would appreciate it if it would do so at a time that’s convenient for me.

You see, as much as I love the snow, I’m already at least one snowfall behind with my snow removal. And looking at the forecast, I’m not sure when I’m going to be able to catch up.

For some reason, December has turned into one of the busiest months of the year for me. You would think things would have slowed down with the kids out of the house, but we still find ourselves busy with plenty of activities. Then there’s also a full slate of holiday celebrations to fit in. And when it does snow, getting out and skiing or snowshoeing or just watching the waves break over the ice on the beach takes priority over clearing it off the driveway.

Needless to say, it’s starting to pile up.

It’s fair to say that snow removal has never been my strongest suit. In fact, there have been winters during which my neighbors — who take snow removal seriously — have cleared their roofs more frequently than I’ve cleared my driveway. And then they did half the street, because the plows didn’t get close enough to the curb.

There was even one year when, with June approaching, my neighbor took his snow blower to the berm in my front yard that had yet to melt — so much for my plan to charge summer tourists to build snowmen in July.

On the other hand, my main motivation to do any snow removal is dry socks — the more loose snow that gets tracked in, the bigger the puddle just inside the door. So, some snow removal is clearly necessary.

But, as I mentioned, the snow hasn’t been falling at times that make it convenient for me to shovel this year. It seems like we’ve had a lot of weekday and weeknight snow, which just doesn’t work for my schedule. It’s not that I’m worried about driving to work in winter conditions, it’s just that having to go to work means I don’t have time to shovel. And after work is no good — if I’m not out doing something, then there’s probably a new episode of some streaming series to watch. “Hawkeye” is definitely more important than dry socks, right?

Then there’s usually a Saturday morning bike class, and recovering from bike class Saturday afternoon. And Sunday morning is football.

So, if the snow could go ahead and start falling sometime Saturday evening, and wrap up after the first round of NFL games on Sunday, that would be prefect for me. I’d have an hour or so to clear the driveway and back deck, with plenty of time left in the day to go for a ski and enjoy that fresh snow.

I suppose that’s a lot to ask of Mother Nature (though I would bet there’s a conspiracy theory out there that claims it can be done). Instead, I’ll just share my Christmas wish with you: lots of snow and dry socks.

Will Morrow lives in Kenai. Email him at willmorrow2015@gmail.com.

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