Op-ed: The power of forgiveness

  • By Cal Thomas
  • Monday, March 16, 2015 9:05pm
  • Opinion

Turn on the news and you expect to see people of different races and politics denouncing each other. That’s why what happened last week on “The Kelly File,” Megyn Kelly’s Fox News program, was so remarkable.

Following the expulsion of Parker Rice and Levi Pettit, two Sigma Alpha Epsilon members at the University of Oklahoma, upon the video release of a racist sing-a-long they led, Isaac Hill, the president of the university’s Black Student Association, told Kelly the students should be forgiven.

Kelly, who is normally in complete control, was stunned and nearly speechless. It was not what she — or any of us — expected. Judgment, retribution, rioting, censorship, shaming, loss of job and prestige are the norm, not forgiveness, especially when the offending students, at the time, hadn’t asked for it.

Hill told Kelly: “It is not smart to fight hate with hate. It is only logical to fight hate with love.”

This brings to mind what Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. said: “We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies.”

What would have better served the interests of OU, Rice and Pettit and the larger student body? Instead of focusing on punishment and expulsion, shutting down the fraternity house and evicting all its residents, the goal should have been redemption. Redemption is a harder road to travel, but the destination should be to change the students’ thinking, not bludgeon them into silence where any racist thoughts might fester and grow worse.

How to accomplish this?

In today’s world of instant communication, which is different from conversation, we know our fellow Americans by categories. We are all parts of groups, often pitted against each other. The integrity of the individual has been gobbled up by groupthink. If you are African-American, for example, you are supposed to be liberal, angry at white people and vote only for Democrats. Those who stray from this ideological and political plantation are to be denounced and expelled.

What should have happened at the University of Oklahoma and at other universities that are now uncovering similar racist incidents by white students is to require them to get to know people of different races. White students should be mandated, as a condition of their continued enrollment, to spend time with students of other races. Dine with them, take in a basketball game with them, meet their parents and listen as they tell their stories. Everyone has a story, but too many of us are unwilling to listen.

Listening to another person’s story humanizes them and fosters equality far more than any civil rights legislation, or attempts to control speech. Many people have said that while they regard Congress as corrupt, they like their congressman because they know him or her. That’s the point. Knowing someone removes, or at least diminishes, any stigma we might have previously associated with a person.

In her book, “The Power of Forgiveness: Why Revenge Doesn’t Work,” Dr. Judith Orloff writes: “…revenge reduces you to your worst self, puts you on the same level with those spiteful people we claim to abhor.”

Isaac Hill told Megyn Kelly he hopes the racist comments can be used as a chance to learn and grow. Offered several opportunities by Kelly to criticize the white students, Hill declined. “Those behaviors are taught,” he said. “We are all born innocent people.”

In the musical “South Pacific,” librettist Oscar Hammerstein II wrote, “You’ve got to be taught to hate.” One can also be taught to love.

Again, Dr. King said it best: “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

Email Cal Thomas at tcaeditors@tribpub.com.

More in Opinion

This image available under the Creative Commons license shows the outline of the state of Alaska filled with the pattern of the state flag.
Opinion: Old models of development are not sustainable for Alaska

Sustainability means investing in keeping Alaska as healthy as possible.

Gov. Mike Dunleavy unveils proposals to offer public school teachers annual retention bonuses and enact policies restricting discussion of sex and gender in education during a news conference in Anchorage. (Screenshot)
Opinion: As a father and a grandfather, I believe the governor’s proposed laws are anti-family

Now, the discrimination sword is pointing to our gay and transgender friends and families.

Kenai Peninsula Education Association President Nathan Erfurth works in his office on Thursday, Oct. 28, 2021, in Soldotna, Alaska. (Ashlyn O’Hara/Peninsula Clarion)
Voices of the Peninsula: Now is the time to invest in Kenai Peninsula students

Parents, educators and community members addressed the potential budget cuts with a clear message.

Gov. Mike Dunleavy holds a press conference at the Capitol on Tuesday, April 9, 2019. (Juneau Empire file photo)
Opinion: An accurate portrayal of parental rights isn’t controversial

Affirming and defining parental rights is a matter of respect for the relationship between parent and child

t
Opinion: When the state values bigotry over the lives of queer kids

It has been a long, difficult week for queer and trans Alaskans like me.

Dr. Sarah Spencer. (Photo by Maureen Todd and courtesy of Dr. Sarah Spencer)
Voices of the Peninsula: Let’s bring opioid addiction treatment to the Alaskans who need it most

This incredibly effective and safe medication has the potential to dramatically increase access to treatment

Unsplash / Louis Velazquez
Opinion: Fish, family and freedom… from Big Oil

“Ultimate investment in the status quo” is not what I voted for.

An orphaned moose calf reared by the author is seen in 1970. (Stephen F. Stringham/courtesy photo)
Voices of the Peninsula: Maximizing moose productivity on the Kenai Peninsula

Maximum isn’t necessarily optimum, as cattle ranchers learned long ago.

(Ben Hohenstatt / Juneau Empire File)
Opinion: The time has come to stop Eastman’s willful and wanton damage

God in the Bible makes it clear that we are to care for the vulnerable among us.

Caribou graze on the greening tundra of the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge in northeast Alaska in June, 2001. (Michael Penn / Juneau Empire File)
Opinion: AIDEA’s $20 million-and-growing investment looks like a bad bet

Not producing in ANWR could probably generate a lot of money for Alaska.

A fisher holds a reel on the Kenai River near Soldotna on June 30, 2021. (Photo by Ashlyn O’Hara/Peninsula Clarion)
Voices of the Peninsula: King salmon closures long overdue

Returns have progressively gone downhill since the early run was closed in June 2012

(Clarise Larson / Juneau Empire File)
Opinion: Fixing legislative salaries and per diem

The state Senate was right to unanimously reject giving a 20% pay… Continue reading