Beating the bully in the work place

Beating the bully in the work place

Sometimes, you feel like you’re back in Sixth Grade.

But you’re not – you’re at work, dealing with the same kind of bully you faced in the schoolyard. It’s just as frustrating now as it was then, but what can you do? You don’t have a teacher to run to, so read “Beating the Workplace Bully” by Lynne Curry instead.

Once you graduated from high school, you figured you were done with those thugs who ruled the playground. But, says Curry, “Bullies and targets exist at all levels and in many organizations” and she can help the latter deal with the former. So what can you do when you’re on the receiving end of a workplace bully?

First, Curry says, remember that, though “no one deserves to be bullied,” it’s “epidemic.” Ninety-six percent of respondents to a 2014 poll reported problems of bullying at work. It’s wise, therefore, to know why you’re a part of that majority.

Next, understand that problems with co-workers don’t just “go away.” If there’s bully in the next cubicle, strive to break old habits and diffuse what’s making you a target. Know what kind of bully you’re dealing with, expand your comfort zone to prepare yourself for what needs to be done, and learn how to empower yourself and “confront confrontation” without stooping to a bully’s level.

Stop playing the bully’s game by recognizing the eight “most common bully traps” and the tactics s/he uses to get under your skin. Don’t let your tormenter have any space in your brain; try to remain calm, neutral, and don’t get angry! Learn the power of the word “REALLY?” Be willing to take notes, note witnesses, and document, document, document. If you notice that colleagues are also having issues with this particular bully, enlist allies and ask for reinforcements.

And finally, if you’re the boss with a bully on your staff, know how to handle what could become a very thorny situation for you and your business. Above all, remember: “don’t play nice – you can’t afford it.”

Oh, how I wish I’d had a book like “Beating the Workplace Bully” back when I needed it! I’m sure it would’ve saved a lot of sleepless nights, job-jumping, and productivity loss, because author Lynne Curry’s advice is solid and straightforward without being rash or antagonizing. And that, as you’ll see here, is exactly what you need to deal with this all-too-common problem.

Curry teaches a certain kind of stand-up-for-yourself Zen in this book, starting with basic hand-holding and moving on to what amounts to guerilla tactics with a lace glove. She also offers a series of quizzes at the end of each chapter, to help readers determine where they sit and what’s next. I found those particularly helpful, and I loved reading the case-studies that accompany each chapter and point.

This is one of those books that you won’t regret having on your shelf, even if you don’t need it right now – because when you do, “Beating the Workplace Bully” will have you well-schooled.

The Bookworm is Terri Schlichenmeyer. Email her at bookwormsez@gmail.com.

More in Life

File
Minister’s Message: Experience the abundant life Jesus has for you

Life of all forms is definitely abundant in most parts of the world.

Historic Elwell Lodge Guest Cabin is seen at its new spot near the Kenai National Wildlife Refuge’s Visitor Center. (USWS)
An enduring legacy — Kenai National Wildlife Refuge cabins

A tremendous wealth of our local history is captured in one unique, entertaining work.

Virginia Walters (Courtesy photo)
Life in the Pedestrian Lane: Survival skills

We compensate all our lives for one thing or another.

tease
Off the shelf: Time and space and the human heart

Contemporary novel combines historical and science fiction for a gripping, emotional journey.

Mary L. Penney, one of only two women known to have joined the Kings County Mining Company’s 1898 expedition to the gold fields of Alaska. (Photo courtesy of the Penney Family Collection)
Mary Penney and Her 1898 Alaska adventure — Part 2

When Mary was 14, she found herself in the company of a “young matron” who was about to give birth.

These pinto beans and rice only take about 10 minutes of hands-on work before they are stewed for about 12 hours in a cooking pot. (Photo by Tressa Dale/Peninsula Clarion)
A complete meal for when you’re pinching pennies

My mother always kept a large tub of rice and beans, provisions she called “struggle food.”

Emerson Kapp and Elias Bouschor rehearse “Our Town” in the Soldotna High School Auditorium in Soldotna, Alaska, on Friday, April 18, 2025. (Jake Dye/Peninsula Clarion)
Ordinary moments find meaning in ‘Our Town’

Soldotna High School stages classic drama in pared down production.

The Triumvirate Theatre stands in Kenai, Alaska, on Saturday, April 19, 2025. (Jake Dye/Peninsula Clarion)
A return to stage

Triumvirate Theatre debuts new performance space.

This takeout favorite is deceptively easy and comes together faster than it can be delivered. (Photo by Tressa Dale/Peninsula Clarion)
A sweet and sour dinner for 3

I really wanted some sweet and sour takeout this weekend, but all my favorite restaurants are far outside of delivery range.

Most Read