2.0°

'Trick 'r Treat'

Bad Hat Harry Productions

1 hour, 22 minutes

'Drag Me to Hell'

Universal Pictures

1 hour, 33 minutes

It's no surprise, to anyone who knows me, that I'm not a big horror movie fan. It's not that I'm squeamish, but I just have a hard time stomaching wanton cruelty, which seems to be the m.o. for most scary movies these days. With "Saw," "Hostel," and Rob Zombie fronting a wave of "torture-porn" films, it's easier for me to just stay away.

It hasn't always been that way, though. When I was a kid the "Friday the 13th" and the "Nightmare on Elm Street" movies each provided their own special brand of thrills and chills. They weren't great cinema, but they were silly and fun. Nowadays, it's all about abject terror and grotesque mutilation.

This year, however, I decided to seek out some good Halloween films in the hopes of redeeming the genre. I picked two, one a straight-to-video afterthought, and the other a major studio release. While I am pleased to report that both of these films are torture-free, they are of wildly varying levels of quality.

The first movie I slid into the DVD player was the horror anthology "Trick 'r Treat," a clever little film that has been completely neglected by its studio and almost totally ignored by the media. The movie, made back in 2007 for the Halloween season, was ultimately shelved for fear that it couldn't compete against whichever idiotic "Saw" sequel was up that year. Now it's being dumped on the video market with little to no fanfare, like a mistake the studio just wishes they could forget.

What a shame. "Trick 'r Treat" is one of the best scary movies I've seen in years. Writer/director Michael Dougherty expertly combines all the classic horror movie clichs into four tightly interwoven tales, each taking place over the course of one spooky All Hallow's Eve. There's the creepy school principal with an unhealthy reverence for the holiday. There're the four kids in search of a ghost story and a prank sure to go horribly awry. The old man whose disgust for the festivities masks a darker secret, and the four lovely ladies out to make this a Halloween night to remember.

The movie is at turns cheesy and bitingly clever, nail-bitingly scary and laugh-out-loud funny. It's got blood and gore, but not so much that it'll make you sick. There's some sex, some language, some violence, but just enough of each to make this film a great reminder of what scary movies used to be like.

Sure, "Trick 'r Treat" isn't a perfect movie, but that's appropriate as well. This is no classic ghost story with the brilliant moodiness of "The Others," or violent and terrifying treatise on man's inhumanity to man, as was "Seven." "Treat" is silly escapist fun, elevated only by clever writing and some terrifically hammy performances. Some of the twists you'll see coming a mile away, some you won't, but in either case, you'll enjoy every jump, jolt, and crazy pumpkin-monster this movie can throw at you. If you plan on seeing "Saw 12," this year, why not skip the typical and try this film instead?

Grade: B+

On the opposite end of the spectrum, I also saw "Drag Me to Hell," a film with a relatively large budget, a big name director ("Spiderman's" Sam Raimi), and at least tacit studio backing, i.e., they released it when they said they would. Unfortunately, all the support in the world couldn't save this bizarrely disjointed story of a girl, a gypsy, and a talking goat. I'm sure defenders of this movie will shout, "Hey, it's supposed to be funny. Lighten up!" This would be a valid defense only if the movie actually was funny. "Drag Me to Hell" is just dumb.

Alison Lohman plays Christine Brown, a loan officer who has the bad luck to receive a creepy old gypsy looking for a third extension on her home mortgage. Hoping to impress her boss into giving her a promotion, Christine denies the woman's request. Bad move. Even if you hadn't seen the previews, you just know a major curse is coming.

To this point, I was totally with the movie. I like the concept, which is classic, yet kind of unique amongst all the other "been there, stabbed that" horror movies on the market today. It's only when Raimi inserts what I must assume is supposed to be the comedy that the film takes a sharp downturn. The gypsy is waiting for Christine in her car and, rather than just simply getting on with the cursing, the two engage in a long and pointless battle, involving staples to the forehead and flying dentures.

Besides spoiling the creepy mood established to this point, this sets up a recurring theme for the rest of the movie. Every time there is a potentially scary scene, Raimi ruins it with excess goo, idiotic special effects, or off-putting "humor." The best example of this is the sance, wherein a trio of psychics combine forces to try to corral and destroy the demon that has been haunting Christine, and who, presumably, wants to drag her to Hell. Raimi sets it up perfectly -- great creepy old house, suitably somber performances, music, lighting, the whole nine yards -- and then trashes it all with a goofy talking goat that looks like it came straight from shooting the Muppet show. My wife summed it up best when she said, "It feels like I'm watching 'Beetlejuice.'"

To say I was disappointed in this film is an understatement. First, I talked my wife into watching it with me, which is a major endeavor in and of itself. "C'mon, it'll be good! It's Sam Raimi. He's good!" She's not going to buy that argument again, I can tell you that.

Sam Raimi, however, is good, which is another reason this trainwreck is so vexing. Aside from "Spiderman 3" I've enjoyed just about everything Raimi has done, and there's no denying that the man knows how to do comedy-horror. "Evil Dead 2" and "Army of Darkness" are hilarious and, upon reflection, these are probably the director's inspiration. The difference is, those films were top to bottom silly, employing Bruce Campbell's rubberfaced mug to great effect.

"Drag Me to Hell" looked like it was going to be serious. Maybe not "Rosemary's Baby" serious, but not a spoof, either. Raimi received huge critical acclaim for "Hell," but when I compare the two films I watched, "Trick" was a far better treat.

Grade: D

"Trick 'r Treat" is rated R for bloody violence, nudity, sexual situations, and language. "Drag Me to Hell" is rated PG-13 for violence, language, and fake looking goo.

Chris Jenness is a freelance graphic designer, artist and movie buff who lives in Nikiski.